When my son Joshua was born, my life was tipped upside down. All routine went out the window. Work stopped. Socializing was put on pause. Suddenly exercise, and indeed sleep, took a backseat.
Months passed, and gradually my wife and I acclimatized to the running-around-with-your-hair-on-fire lifestyle of new parents.
We went back to work, Joshua started nursery, he learned to walk, babble and sleep through the night.
But two years on, one thing has never returned to pre-parent normality. That thing is exercise.
I used to exercise every day. Even if it was a quick 15-minute workout before hopping in the shower. I prioritized and preached daily movement.
Now, I'm constantly skipping workouts. Or I'll set my alarm extra early so I can cram a session in before work and morning dad duties—only to suffer for the rest of the day due to sleep exhaustion.
So when I learned that Korey Rowe, the new star trainer on Chris Hemsworth's fitness app Centr, celebrated the birth of his first child at a similar time to me, I asked him for some advice; what should new parents do to return to fitness?
His advice; stop prioritizing exercise.
One thing new parents should do to stay fit and healthy
“I wouldn't start with exercise,” Rowe tells Fit&Well. “As a new parent, you want to make sure that the things you can do when you're busy are the things that are dialed in.”
For example, what you eat and how you recover should come first.
“If you can prioritize your sleep, your nutrition is dialed in, and you're feeling good, then it will put you in a place where you can exercise. Then your fitness comes in as that amplifier.”
Rowe says that you have to “take care of the 23 hours” so you're able to exercise in that remaining 60 minutes.
“You want to feel good and take care of the majority of your day. When you do that, you'll make a lot less excuses for working out because you'll be feeling better.”
Tiredness is one of the most common reasons that Rowe hears for new parents letting their fitness slip.
“If they don't have those things [sleep and nutrition] under control, working out feels like an extra stressor,” he continues. “It doesn't feel like a release.”
Instead, he says; “you want to get your body to a point where you're minimizing stress, so the workout can serve the purpose that it's intended to—without it feeling like the straw that breaks the camel's back”.
Four steps I've been following to improve my sleep
Mulling over Rowe's answer, I realized I've been looking at exercise all wrong since Joshua arrived.
I've been feeling guilty if I didn't get a workout in, and often forced myself to exercise after a heavily disrupted night, much to the detriment of my health—and likely my ability to show up as my best version for my son.
So now, since Rowe's intervention, I've been trying to reframe my approach to exercise.
Although very much a work in progress, here are four steps I've been taking to improve the quality of my sleep—so that I'm in a better state to exercise when the opportunity arises.
1. Setting a consistent wake and bed time
Research has shown that greater sleep variability can lead to adverse health outcomes, whereas consistency—including on weekends—helps regulate the body's circadian rhythm, or internal clock.
Now, I try to stick to lights out by 11pm, and up at 6am every day, which usually provides a small window to work out before Joshua wakes up.
2. Following a 10-minute pre-bed stretching routine
Following a chat with pliability's Cody Mooney, I've swapped the post-workout stretches—that I rarely do—for a pre-bed mobility routine that I'm less likely to skip.
I've found it helps me to wind down physically, and emotionally decompress after a busy day.
3. Taking a night-time sleep supplement
After dinner, I've also started drinking a nighttime hot chocolate formula from Awesome Supplements, packed with sleep-promoting ingredients including plant extracts, amino acids, cherry powder and ashwagandha root.
The supplements might help me drift off quicker, but the pre-bed ritual of a bedtime cup of cocoa is what I really enjoy.
4. Getting 20 minutes of natural daylight first thing
This is another tip that's said to help regulate your body's circadian rhythm, and I've found it works far better than a shot of caffeine to perk me up in the morning.
On weekdays, I'll usually get 20 minutes of daylight on my walk to work, then on weekends, it's a good excuse to take Joshua out for a stroll to the local coffee shop or park.
